Credit: Joel CoenI was listening to NPR in the background just wrapping up work when this phrase snapped me into attention: “I want to be revered. I want to be an elder; I want to be an elderess.”
The familiar voice of actor Frances McDormand wrapped up the interview. I quickly jumped to NPR.org and was delighted to find the full interview posted with a link to listen.
Below are two outtakes from McDormand talking about aging and ageism. She observes, accurately and sagely, that ageism is a cultural illness that society makes us think is personal.
Frances, we revere you!
by Jojo Whilden/HBOOn her recent interview with The New York Times:
One of the reasons that I am doing press again after 10 years’ absence is because I feel like I need to represent publicly what I’ve chosen to represent privately — which is a woman who is proud and more powerful than I was when I was younger. And I think that I carry that pride and power on my face and in my body. And I want to be a role model for not only younger men and women — and not just in my profession, I’m not talking about my profession. I think that cosmetic enhancements in my profession are just an occupational hazard. But I think, more culturally, I’m interested in starting the conversation about aging gracefully and how, instead of making it a cultural problem, we make it individuals’ problems. I think that ageism is a cultural illness; it’s not a personal illness.
On how difficult it is to get older — and how cosmetic surgery doesn’t make it any easier:
Getting older and adjusting to all the things that biologically happen to you is not easy to do, and is a constant struggle and adjustment. So, anything that makes that harder and more difficult — because I don’t believe that cosmetic enhancement makes it easier; I think it makes it harder. I think it makes it much more difficult to accept getting older. I want to be revered. I want to be an elder; I want to be an elderess. I have some things to talk about and say and help. And, if I can’t, then — not unlike Olive — I don’t feel necessary.
Thank you for having the courage to speak so clearly. I am also embracing the elder croness of myself and serving other women to find their freedom in being and owning that they are the wise women the world needs today.
she is so right. all this nonsense about looking younger does make aging harder, because it is so prevalent in our society. the important thing is that we are physically and mentally able to enjoy our lives , not that we look younger. we are expected to LOOK young to keep our job or to get a job. we are treated like we are feeble and senile if we LOOK our age. i don’t know the statistics, but i don’t know many feeble or senile older people. most of them have life experience and a clearer outlook on life then most younger people. look at people like jane goodall! i do want to look good,but that doesn’t mean younger. i want even more to feel good and be healthy and i want to be a person who continues to grow as a person. i feel that i am a stronger and a better person than i ever was. yes, look at me as an elder…
Thank you Frances McDormand for saying what needs to be said.
WOW! We are aging from the moment we are born and yet our culture vilifies age. Embrace it, enjoy it! Make our culture inclusive for all