Martin Bayne Talks about Life on the Inside

 Martin Bayne Talks about Life on the Inside

Martin Bayne

Today’s must read is an interview that Martin Bayne recently gave to the New York Times.

Those who follow his writing here at ChangingAging know that Martin offers and unflinching and completely authentic view of life on the inside of long-term care.

As NYT reporter Judith Graham notes…

Mr. Bayne ran one of the largest long-term-care insurance brokerages in the United States, and a well-known Web site,, before being struck by early-stage Parkinson’s 18 years ago. After becoming seriously disabled, he moved to an assisted living center in upstate New York in 2002 — a difficult transition. Three years ago, Mr. Bayne relocated to a facility in northeastern Pennsylvania, where he has a single room and receives several hours of help from aides every day.

How honest is Martin about what life is like where he lives? Consider his take on the issue of loneliness…

Sometimes just a hand on someone’s shoulder is all it takes. Sometimes picking up a fork that someone drops in the dining room on the floor. Sometimes, just sitting with someone. Trying to make people more comfortable. The simplest things in the world can lead to what I call incremental victories. That’s what I go for in my life.

I sneak in touches whenever I can. I call them sneak attacks. I just go over and touch someone’s hand or some other part of them. Men are in need of it the most. Men are never touched, at least in this culture of people with tiny hearts who live on glaciers of ambition. When you do touch them, a magical connection happens.

Please consider sending people to the link so others can benefit from Martin’s insights.


Article written by Dr. Bill Thomas,

Bill is a visionary leader in the online Changing Aging movement and a world-renowned authority on geriatric medicine and eldercare. Bill is founder of two movements to reshape long-term care globally – The Eden Alternative and Green House Project.